Another experience I would like to share has taken place meanwhile. Finding out that art doesn’t provide Christmas presents for my family, I worked ten days in the central shopping mall selling shampoo, socks and plastic jewelery. Again, this was Real Work. 12 hours a day, 10 days in a row. With less amount of work time the money acquired would have been too insignificant. It’s cheap labour, it so is.
There are two things to point out from this gig.
a) Standing behind a counter is HARD WORK. Physically and mentally. It’s a different species of human that actually works at the malls, I’m sure of that now. At first your back and feet hurt and you feel like you’re going to die. Then you get really REALLY tired of the zillions of people I normally wouldn’t like and now have to smile to and the never-stopping Christmas carols… I think I eventually reached a sort of a robot-like state of meditation. At first the brain stops thinking. And then it starts thinking on a totally new level. Who are these people? Have they come shopping or are they just passing by, unexpectedly in need of some things? Eventually you start to analyze every single purchase, connecting it with the client. A lady known from social magazines buys a pair of men’s socks and a pack of cotton at 9 am Sunday morning. A gentleman with lots of make-up pays for a a soap rose and a razor. The all present their discount cards and I get to know their names. I don’t think many of them bother to read my name tag. I know them now a bit more – but remain anonymous to them myself.
b) The philosophy of giftshopping. Especially during Christmas, one has several presents that are not optional. You just need to give presents to some people. If you’re lucky, you really want to give the presents and know them enough to make enjoyable gifts. It still seems that many people have to make compulsory presents to blurry persons called mother-in-laws, nieces, nephews, wives-of-second-cousins and such. And they go to the mall and grab any item they can reach. And they think: HA! I can give him/her.. ee.. THIS!.. whatever this is! And without further pondering they lift the cheap-looking gift box of dandruff shampoo and Christmas socks (with images of drunken reindeer saying Ho, Ho, Ho, bitch) into the shopping basket and continue the hunt for similar items. And I, sitting next to the pile of gift boxes see all the hundred boxes leave the store into different directions and I know there are a hundred persons in Estonia that receive dandruff shampoo and reindeer socks for Christmas and think of the options of how many of them would actually be in need of socks or suffering from dandruff. Or the amount of candles, chocolate, gift books and other stuff I received myself. Of course, I eat the chocolate and burn the candles. But still there’s something bothering me in maniac people buying useless and overpriced stuff.
On the first day of Christmas, while emptying the basement of my mother’s apartment from my childhood memories and crap, I saw an empty blue MEXX gift box of shower gel and deodorant in the garbage bin. I felt like meeting an old colleague. So one of them ended up in our house. A small world it is, a small world.